Infidelity/Cheating In Marriage
World over infidelity has eaten up our various society, be it black or white causing sour hearts and making many to seat and think is marriage really worth it. Due to this factor many have define many types of relationships that does not please God in terms of the fundamentals that should guide marriage. Marriage is supposed to be scared between a man and a woman.
This is why from a Christian point of view is better to court and understand a bit of each other to see compatibility before you even decide to go ahead in marriage. Some men and women come from different background with baggage’s where father had cheated on mother previously or even experienced domestic violence to the highest level. Courtship will give you opportunity to have a clue of these hidden vices.
Reasons for Infidelity
- Emotional disconnection – This happens easily through sex. When couples become emotionally disconnected hardly would there not be infidelity. Either the woman is starving the man sexually through rejection or withdrawal symptoms, the moment such a man see an acceptance anywhere else he is clinging on it. When you have a man who is too busy at work, always travelling kind of man, the women always end up with people less standard of the man, either with a servant, driver, a brother in-law, or even colleague of the husband at work. This can be avoided even the bible warns that if a man or woman needs to engage in a long time fasting it must be in agreement of the both persons. Why? To avoid infidelity.
- Lack of communication – This cannot be over emphasized in any relationship, if you do not communicated with your spouse you will never know the worth of the person and the weight of the stress the person is carrying on the inside. A woman’s life is like story telling and there is always an audience that listen when a story is told. If you are a man and you do not give ears to the story of your wife she will seek for a better audience which is the arms of another man. Women wants to be appreciated every now and then, get use to that so that you don’t loose your spouse. Men on the other hand are looking for a spouse who can unpack the storage of thoughts on the inside. I see where spouse are at the dinner table and they all have something to distract them from communicating. The woman or her phone while the man has the magazine. Cheating is fast approaching on those spouse because there should be nothing too important than the company of one another.
- Financial pressure – This is one of the demon that has eaten into the fiber of many homes. Everyone likes the good life but not at the detriment of your spouse. I happen to know a couple that these happened to, where the man is aware of the fact that his wife is sleeping around in other to get huge contract or milk money out of her male friends. When it turn ugly the rest was history. It is better you live within the confluence of your affordability, either the man is too poor and the woman gets a lapdog on the side that can give her good life, or vice versa. To avoid financial pressure takes planning and is not a day thing. A man was working and everyday the wife was always nagging him of all the needs in the house, she did not stop there , she decide to report the man to his boss at work. The boss asked her to come back at month end when the pay check will be handed out to workers. So instead of paying the man, the payment will go to the woman. She arrived as agreed and she sat down together with the husband and the boss. So the boss asked her how much it cost about all the list she nags the man every month. She gave the prices and she was paid and found out that even the salary of the man was not covering the expenses of the family. She never knew how many times the husband borrowed to make sure he did not disappoint his family. The truth as it was, the woman broke down and began to cry and ask her husband to forgive her. The opposite would have been the case if the boss had not used such wisdom.
- Lack of compatibility – This is very common among the so called socialite in our communities. How can a 50 year old man marry a 20 years old girl (lady). No matter how he keeps up he cannot satisfy her in bed, which will leave her looking for more. They are not compatible because she will see the man as her father or uncle so to say. Most of such marriages happen in order to keep business ties going. Even more dangerous is a marriage between the poor and rich. Whichever party is the rich will not accord the poor the full respect even if he is the head of the family especially if is the woman that comes from a rich background. Is like a very famous person marrying a no name, the respect line will be very slim. A hard working woman marrying a very lazy man who sleeps and wakes up when money has exchange hands in the pocket of the resourceful men can hardly get the respect of the woman except for divine intervention. Lack of compatibility leads to bottle up anger that explodes at the face of a little provocation, when people are not compatible they tend to want to disrespect one another every now and then, and the easy way out is to look for who can accord you the respect and it leads to infidelity.
Infidelity is not the plan of God for any relationship rather it kills the beauty of marriage that the Lord has empowered. All the afar-mentioned list can be avoided if there is proper courtship done before marriage and if minds thoughts are on things above not on earth then we will live counting our days knowing that the times we are in is evil. If you are at the cross roads is not too late to turn back and ask for help God’s ways to sort you out. This is why we are help, contact us or join the coaching session and learn to live above board. http://www.singlesandmarriedwithpastorv.com/signup/